The Friday Fix

  • ‘Closer To Fine’ – Indigo Girls

    Gill writes:

    Okay – so I’m a hummer. And we’re not talking about the gas-guzzling, all-terrain military vehicle that seems so popular in California. That would be a bit silly. What I mean is that those who live with me have to suffer an almost constant, almost unconscious humming of tunes. There are some that are regular tunes – so regular that they feel almost innate; and there are other tunes that are triggered by hearing a song – usually on the radio but it could be because I have overheard someone else humming or singing a tune.

    Whilst my incessant humming might be annoying to those I live with, it’s actually really good for me. And singing is too. Why? Because it stimulates our vagus nerve. The vagus nerve is the longest nerve in the body – it connects our brain to many important organs including the gut, heart and lungs. Without going too deep into it, humming is really good for your health – it helps relieve stress, boosts our immunity and improves the health of our nervous system.

    So, now I need to confess that one of the regular tunes that I hum is ‘Barbie Girl’ by Aqua. Don’t ask me why. It just seems to be part of my repertoire. Just be thankful that I didn’t choose it for today’s Friday Fix.

    Instead, I’ve chosen a song that features in the recently released ‘Barbie’ film (see what I did there?). A film, that for me married fluffy fizz with pathos, fantasy with real life, liberation with societal constraints. Some have found it a bit too preachy – or as one friend described it ‘being kensplained to’. I can understand this. Maybe the frustration comes because ultimately there is only some resolution to the patriarchy/feminist debate in the film and it doesn’t feel quite complete enough – I guess that’s just mirroring life.

    But never mind all that. Let’s get back to the song. A song that was perfect for that point in the film. The part where Barbie goes wandering and wondering. And this song couldn’t be more perfect.

    And I went to the doctor, I went to the mountains
    I looked to the children, I drank from the fountains
    There’s more than one answer to these questions
    Pointing me in a crooked line
    And the less I seek my source for some definitive

    Closer I am to fine, yeah
    Closer I am to fine, yeah

    This is a song that’s all about questioning and seeking. Why am I here? What is my purpose? Who is going to help me answer these questions? Where do I go to get these questions answered? Are there actually answers to my questions? As the lyrics say – there’s more than one answer.

    And those answers take us along a crooked line. A reminder that life, and the meaning of life, is not straightforward at all. It’s wibbly-wobbly and all over the place. My crooked line of life is so crooked it goes back on itself more than once too.

    Life is all about wandering and wondering. It isn’t easy at times but I think part of the mystery of life is to continue finding out and learning more – about ourselves, about others, and about our world. Ask questions. Don’t take things for granted. Put a bit of effort into understanding.

    “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind, and your neighbour as yourself.” (Luke 10:27)

    With all your mind. Hmmm. I wonder sometimes that we might be a little bit lazy on this account. Do we really love God with all our mind? Do we wander and wonder enough?

    I think the Indigo Girls are right to go looking everywhere for their answers. The times in my life, when I have made leaps and bounds in progressing my understanding of myself, my world and my God, are when I have been alongside others who aren’t afraid to ask questions and grapple with difficult concepts and situations. I’ve been blessed by many colleagues who have nudged, poked and provoked my thinking over the years – so much so that when we were the East Central Regional Team of the Methodist Learning Network, this image summed us up:

    So keep pushing through. Seek answers about the world that we live in. Travel that crooked line. Wander and wonder. Edge closer and closer to fine.

    The Indigo Girls are still performing as much as ever and in two weeks’ time, they will be gracing the Friday Night Glade Stage with their presence at this year’s Greenbelt Festival.

    Find out more about them at https://www.indigogirls.com/

  • ‘Chances’ – Athlete

    Jane writes:

    I’m such a sucker for a first line and it’s often through that lyrical content that I get drawn into a song. This one is no different. Alongside that, the joyous sound of Athlete and their big sweeping melodies that work against what they have to say, mean that this song is one that goes somewhere and provokes all sorts of thoughts. Athlete have a home at the FF where other writers have reflected on what they have to say, especially about the harder things in life.

    Take all your chances while you can

    Never know when they’ll pass you by

    Those first two phrases are probably enough to fill any journal you write for days. It sounds on the face of it an easy instruction but what might prevent you is often more the problem. Your life context and financial stability say. Your embarrassment factor. Your lack of self-worth – possibly put there by another. Your risk aversion. Your absolute sense that you’ve no idea if it’s the right thing. I could go on…..

    And then for people of faith it’s often about grappling with whether the chance is the right one to take, given all that they know about the God they worship and love

    There’s something too about the complexity of that decision-making process that never goes away. Humanity has never been immune to such choices and throughout history, people have used all sorts of approaches and plans, and ideas to help. The toss of a coin, mind maps, strategic plans, algorithms and forecasts. In our scriptures – prayer, laid-out fleeces and other signs and wonders, chance happenings that seem to point the way, ancient writings from other believers, and clearly-heard directions. Literally and metaphorically like a sum that can’t be solved.

    Like a sum a mathematician cannot solve

    Like me trying my hardest to explain

    But the songwriter then has something much more emotional to link to. Cries and kisses. Something much more about the feelings that lead to action and not regret. Emotions that plot a takeover and win. Emotions that link us to ourselves, others and the divine. Emotions that enable us to express our faith not just in language and ideas but in instinct and belief.

    It’s all about your cries and kisses

    Those first steps that I can’t calculate

    I need some more of you to take me over

    This song is a lovesong of course – there’s not many songs that aren’t in their own way – but it also encourages us to contemplate a whole lot of other big life questions. Life questions that God is interested in for us. Life questions that rise out of a deep sense of knowing who we are as unique and precious, “fearfully and wonderfully made.” Life questions that tap into our emotions and thought processes. Life questions that just may encourage us to take the holy risk, and alongside that, all our chances while we can.

    Athlete split in 2013 and, although their members are busy doing other things, the only remnant seems to be a Facebook page and fabulous music

    Oooh – and this track was used at the end of a Dr Who episode – you can see a bit of that here – https://youtu.be/ubTJI_UphPk

  • ‘Summer’s in Bloom’ – Reef

    Tom writes:

    There are many songs that take me back to parts of my childhood summers, but the one that really gets me smiling is Reef’s “Summer’s in Bloom”. When I hear it, I’m immediately back in Somerset, hanging out at Greenbank outdoor pool, or in the beer garden of the Street Inn, or up the park with cider from the local farm. Or maybe the memories are from further back, of cycle rides through the local estate (the kind with gamekeepers, not council houses) with my cricket bat on my back to get to the club I played for, of evening adventures up the Wrekin with the youth club or Scouts, or camping out in the field behind my mate’s house. There’s a million and one other memories it brings flooding back as well, all of them bringing a smile to my face.

    Yet, here’s the thing: the album Glow, from which this song comes, wasn’t released until January 1997, when I was already 18 and part way through my third year of A-Levels while of my mates had already moved off to university or found jobs. And so the song that has me bathing in memories of glorious childhood and teenage summers didn’t come out until I was almost 20 and those days were behind me! Why is that? Well, in part it’s because it’s Reef, and the couple of places it mentions in the lyrics are places I can identify – indeed, my sister lives not far from Cinnamon Lane in Glastonbury. I never went swimming there, but a Westcountry accent singing about summer swimming is just bound to take my mind back, isn’t it, even if it’s to a pool rather than a river? And from there, the mind does the rest!

    Of course, the reality is that not only is it strange that a song not released until the end of my childhood should so strongly remind me of the childhood it played no part in, but the reality is that I don’t think my summers were ever quite as glorious as I remember. I’m pretty sure it’s a case of rose-tinted (sun)glasses! While I can’t describe my childhood and teenage years as bad (I know I have friends whose childhoods are genuinely entitled to that description and stronger), they were far from perfect – I was both bullied and a bully, who struggled at times to fit in socially and who developed physically quite late. I’m also pretty certain that I only went to Greenbank a handful of times, and I definitely only camped in that field the once! Yet, I definitely look back with fondness to those summers, whether amid the wheat fields and playing fields of Shropshire, or amid the play parks and beer gardens of Somerset.

    I suspect church life is very much like this too. When we look back we remember with fondness the full churches on a Sunday, and over-flowing Sunday Schools, and gloriously sunny picnic outings. I’m sure those things existed, but I am not convinced they were a weekly occurrence in most of our churches most of the time. And even if they were I suspect we weren’t yet old enough to experience quite how much energy they required of the leaders and organisers, and that it was a good 30-40 years ago at least!

    Honestly, fond memories of the past are a good thing, even if they are heavily filtered through pink prisms. Yet we have to be careful that the memories that make us smile don’t catch us in the trap that is nostalgia. Time is a one-way road and we can’t go back. And anyway, the past is a foreign country, they do things differently there. We are where and when we are. So, as I listen to Reef sing of past summers in bloom, I’ll continue to smile about those that happened when I was younger than now I am, but I’ll also make sure I put my focus on enjoying the summer that’s in bloom right now!

    You can find Reef at a handful of festivals this summer – find out more here https://www.reeftheband.com/

  • ‘Believe in Humanity’ – Carole King

    Jane writes:

    This song sounds like 1973. It is one of those tracks though that lyrically might have been written yesterday. I suppose what that says is that the same anxieties and realities are lifelong – which although it’s comforting, doesn’t bring joy. When Carole King suggests that you read the paper to discover history as it unfolds then she is already aware that you won’t like what you read. That it will somehow be incomprehensible and unbearable – so much so that she would rather not hear it and maintain her hope that humanity will come good, despite the evidence.

    If you read the papers you may see History in the making

    You’ll read what they say life is all about

    They say it’s there for the taking

    Yeah, but you should really check it out

    If you want to know what’s shaking

    But don’t tell me about the things you’ve heard

    Maybe I’m wrong, but I want to believe in humanity

    I guess she is articulating what people have thought forever. We live in a very tough world but we also see pockets of goodness that give us hope. Fast forward to today then and read a paper if you dare. Climate disaster and war fill the pages, not to mention the misogyny, homophobia and racism evident in stories across the known world. Our unkindness is palpable

    I know it’s often true — sad to say

    We have been unkind to one another

    Tell me how many times has the golden rule

    Been applied by man to his brother

    I believe if I really looked at what’s going on

    I would lose faith I never could recover

    I wonder then if a belief in humanity is misplaced. After all, the 50 years that have passed since the song was written have given little reason to build our faith. What now then? I really don’t know.

    I’d like to think that we still have enough good people to nudge things along ; I’d like to imagine that those who channel the spirit of God at work can harness their enthusiasm and share it to make a difference; I’d like to think that enough good people can gather and protest and model all good things; I’d like to believe that people will wake up and see that divisiveness is not a way forward.

    Whatever you do though, don’t stop reading or watching the news. It is history in the making but also the living reality of now for us. I believe that by paying attention, we may just be prompted to be the best of humanity, restore the belief of others, and live up to the invitation of what God requires of us.

    We may also discover those little pockets of goodness that will fuel our own belief in humanity.

    Carole King may be happy too.

    Carole is still making music. You can find out more here https://www.caroleking.com/bio

  • ‘This is to Mother You’ – Sinéad O’Connor

    Kristie writes:

    There have already been many moving tributes to Sinéad O Connor who sadly died this week. She was inspirational in the way she used her voice – the raw emotion coming through as she sang, and her courage in speaking up about really important matters, whether it be refugees, abuse, or the way Irish history has been portrayed.

    Saddened by her death, like many, I took the opportunity to play songs I’d not listened to for a while. I had forgotten her beautiful “This is to Mother You”, the words of which speak to me of how God is when I need her most.

    This is to mother you

    To comfort you and get you through

    Through when your nights are lonely

    Through when your dreams are only blue

    This is to mother you

    I have felt God’s comfort on lonely nights. I have imagined being held in her loving arms. Clearly, this song will have specific resonance for some – I’m fortunate enough to have been well-mothered. How powerful to have these words in our heads at those times we most need to be cherished.

    The next verses continue to reassure me that God takes all that troubles me and instead offers tender love:

    All the pain that you have known

    All the violence in your soul

    All the wrong things you have done

    I will take from you when I come

    All mistakes made in distress

    All your unhappiness

    I will take away with my kiss, yes

    I will give you tenderness

    The sense of being known, loved and held is so valuable to me and so this next verse resonates especially:

    For child I am so glad I’ve found you

    Although my arms have always been around you

    Sweet bird although you did not see me I saw you

    However you feel right now, I hope you know you too are seen and loved.

  • ‘Anywhere’ – Rita Ora

    Gill writes:

    You know when you have those moments in group situations where you have to share something slightly ‘unusual’ about yourself in an icebreaker?

    Mine would be ‘I’ve never been on a package holiday.’

    Well yes, I’m sure I’m not alone in this but every summer my Facebook feed is bombarded with friends having a lovely time on holidays that others have arranged for them – TUI, Mark Warner, Jet2, Thomas Cook, etcetera, etcetera. The package holiday thing has just never appealed to me because I love planning our holidays so much and I wouldn’t want to delegate it to someone else to do.

    In another life, I think I would have enjoyed being an independent travel agent. In fact, when I did the Golden Circles exercise in finding your ‘why,’ it was all centred around journeying and finding yourself in different places. I wonder if Thomas Cook fancy trialling a chaplaincy role…

    Anyhow, I digress.

    Travel and new places have always excited me. And it brings even more joy to travel to new places with my husband and son. Every time we travel together, I can taste the excitement and sense of adventure that the three of us feel and share in together. In this respect, I know that Rob, Max and I are truly kindred spirits.

    Along with researching and booking our travel and accommodation (from tents to camper vans to gites to hotels), I will also spend a good while looking at potential days out – places that I know we’ll all enjoy or that might surprise us. Every day is a learning day in our family.

    And, of course, every holiday needs a playlist. Again, compiled around what each of us likes with a few extras thrown in. The extras are often songs relating to the area that we’re visiting – or they might be about journeys and travel.

    This song by Rita Ora is one of my favourites to pop on the playlist when we’re taking a road trip in Europe. As soon as I hear it, I’m transported to autoroutes or autobahns with the road lying ahead of us with a different place to stay that night. This song, to me, means holidays and freedom.

    Over the hills and far away
    A million miles from L.A.
    Just anywhere away with you
    I know we’ve got to get away
    Someplace where no one knows our name
    We’ll find the start of something new

    I think I can speak for all of my family when I say that we find it energising and life-giving to arrive in an unfamiliar place where we may not speak the language and with very few Brits around (if any). That nudge just out of the comfort zone into the growth zone builds confidence, understanding and stretches your mind perfectly.

    Stretching your mind – come on Gill, you’re on holiday! You should be stretching your legs out on a lounger by the pool or on a beach, I hear you say. And that’s perfect – for others; rest comes in different forms for each of us. For me, my mind switches off completely from everyday things because of all the unfamiliar places and new things around me.

    In fact, there are 7 types of rest (a nice biblical number there) and this is what any type of holiday can gift us.

    physical – sleeping and napping, but also stretching and massage

    mental – regular breaks where your focus changes

    spiritual – prayer, meditation, mindfulness

    emotional – space and time to identify feelings

    social – spending time with people who support and energise us

    sensory – closing your eyes or being in a dark or quiet space

    creative – appreciating nature, art, beauty

    Rest is so, so important for us humans. It’s easy in our busy, stressful world to not make proper space for it; I think many people feel guilty when they rest – and I think that there are people who interfere and don’t enable people to rest properly either. Those amongst who take their work phone on holiday and are ‘contactable’ in an emergency are just not resting properly. Are any of us so important that the ‘office’ can’t operate without us for 10-14 days?

    So – if you are having a summer holiday in the next few weeks – enjoy your rest. And if you are travelling, may you travel with those who you would go anywhere, just anywhere, with.

    You can find out more about Rita Ora at http://www.ritaora.com

  • ‘The Glass’ – Foo Fighters

    Tom writes:

    Gill’s much-loved Blur aren’t the only band making a come-back this year. Another band doing so are Foo Fighters. For sure, they haven’t been gone that long, but on the back of the sudden death of drummer Taylor Hawkins (a drummer who steps into Dave Grohl’s seat and not only succeeds but thrives is a drummer who will be sorely missed!) the question was understandably asked by fans as to whether they would be back again. It was undoubtedly asked by the band too.

    Yet here they are, back with a new drummer, Josh Freese, and a new album – an album I personally think is one of their most powerful to date. Understandably, it is an album that audibly processes the grief that the band experienced at the sudden and unexpected death of their great friend and drummer. It is also, as songs such as The Teacher make clear, also an album that includes Grohl’s processing of his grief following the death of his mother – a woman who played a significant role in supporting and encouraging the Nirvana drummer and Foo Fighters frontman’s career in music.

    To me, the track that stands out the most when I listen to the album is ‘The Glass’, which opens with the lines “I had a vision of you and just like that I was left to live without it… I found a version of love and just like that I was left to live without it… Waiting for this storm to pass, waiting on this side of the glass, but I see my reflection in you, see your reflection in me, how could it be?”

    In these words, I find something of the truth that I try to encapsulate when I am given the deep privilege and awesome responsibility of leading funerals.

    The first part of that truth is that grief is a perfectly natural and appropriate response to death. In this day and age that seems always wants smiles and laughter in celebration of a life lived well, those of us committed to speaking truth must be clear that the death of a loved one or loved ones hurts, deeply, and to diminish that hurt is to deny the way in which we are left to live without the vision and love of the one who has died. As I lead funerals I hold onto my memories of funerals I experienced in South Africa where wailing and sobbing were an expected, normal part of the occasion. To misquote the oft-used, and mis-understood, lines: death is most certainly not nothing at all.

    Yet, at the same time, as a Christian minister I am called to acknowledge another truth – that death is not the end nor the final word. There are, of course, numerous ways to explore this. For me, the way I have usually offered to congregations is to consider that all love is but a part of the great love of God, who is indeed Love itself, and that since there is nothing in all creation, not even death, that can separate us from God’s love in Christ then so there is nothing that can separate us, not even death, from the love of the one we see no longer, nor separate them from ours.

    To grieve is to demonstrate that we love. And our love is a reflection of God’s love, which has overcome even death. So, while we see dimly through the glass, nonetheless we can rejoice in the ongoing, undefeated love we have experienced and which is reflected both in our grief and in the ways we continue to live as reflections of the love we have known, still know, and will know into eternity.

    Find out more about Foo Fighters at https://www.foofighters.com/

  • ‘The Narcissist’ – Blur

    Gill writes:

    1993. A significant year in my life. The year that I got married.

    1993. The year I saw U2’s Zooropa Tour at Roundhay Park, Leeds.

    1993. The year that Blur began to appear on my music radar properly.

    Eventually, they would go on to nudge U2 from my ‘favourite band’ top spot.

    I followed Blur right through the 1990’s into the new millenium, and as their music began to evolve to the point of them beginning to go their separate ways, my love for their music began to wane. I may have dabbled in lead singer Damon Albarn’s ‘Gorillaz’ work and sampled bass player Alex James’s cheeses over the years; I didn’t abandon them completely.

    So imagine my delight to hear this single which was released about a month ago. It feels like a return to the Blur of the mid-90’s, reminiscent of ‘End of a Century’ and ‘The Universal’, it’s filled with pathos as it comments on certain aspects of life. This is the Blur that I fell in love with all those years ago. It’s like an early 30th Wedding Anniversary present!

    Their music, for me, has often captured the mood of the time, so choosing narcissism seems rather apt given the exposure that we’ve had to narcissists recently. Just in case you need a definition – Narcissist: (noun) ‘a person who has an excessive interest in or admiration of themselves’. I’ll leave you to reflect on who they may be.

    This song takes us on a journey from self-obsession to self-reflection and transformation. The opening verse perfectly captures that feeling of looking in the mirror and seeing the different personas, or faces, that we wear. The public ‘me’ and the private ‘me’.

    Yet when you start to embrace your real self in order to transcend and be liberated, you need to acknowledge the darker parts of you – the parts that you don’t like or are frightened of. Not only is Pierrot a sad and tearful clown, but there are people who have coulrophobia, a fear of clowns. An apt metaphor.

    Looked in the mirror
    So many people standing there
    I walked towards them
    Into the floodlights
    I heard no echo (no echo)
    There was distortion everywhere (everywhere)
    I found my ego (my ego)
    I felt rebuttal standing there
    Found my transcendence (transcendence)
    It played in mono painted blue (painted blue)
    You were the Pierrot (the Pierrot)
    I was the dark room (the dark room)

    Possibly the hardest part of self-development is that others don’t develop with you – or won’t acknowledge the changes they see in you. People new to faith will often talk of how their friends and family struggle with the change, and quite often try to put you ‘back into the box’ that they had you in.

    People who are recovering addicts (like The Narcissist in the song) say that one of the greatest challenges is managing relationships with friends who shared in their addiction – drinking buddies for example. There will be some who want you to return to the drinker/substance misuser/smoker you were, and their behaviour can also mirror back to you the person that you used to be.

    I’m going to shine a light in your eyes (in your eyes)
    You’ll probably shine it back on me

    A recovering addict knows that they need to break this cycle, have determination and recognise that a higher power can guide them through this journey.

    But I won’t fall this time
    With Godspeed, I’ll heed the signs

    Throughout the song, you sense the yearning for connection, love and transformation. The solstice, taking acid and travelling hint at something spiritual and escapist but instead of fulfilment, darkness appears and addiction takes over.

    I saw the solstice (the solstice)
    The service station on the road (on the road)
    I took the acid (the acid)
    Under the white horses (the road)
    My heart, it quickened (it quickened)
    I could not tear myself away (myself away)
    Became addiction (addiction)
    If you see darkness, look away (look away)

    And then there’s hope. The hope that nature and love of this glorious world in which we live can connect us and lead us to peace. Even if we aren’t a narcissist, the lyrics can still prompt us to reflect on ourselves, where we’ve been and where we might be at the moment. And that we should continue to seek real connection with ourselves, others and the Divine – and through this, we can be transformed.

    Oh, glorious world (glorious)
    Oh, potent waves, valleys gone wild (potent waves)
    Connect us to love (us to love)
    And keep us peaceful for a while (for a while)

    So be it.

    Find out more about Blur at https://www.blur.co.uk/?frontpage=true

  • ‘Kickstarts’ – Example

    Marc writes:

    Every summer from the age of 10 to 21, I packed my bag for at least one week’s camping with a bunch of young people of my age. The Christian camps gave me a good basis for a lot of the things that make me who I am today and every year I got reintroduced to Jesus.

    Every year the scene was set to learn what it is to be a Christian in the world, and at some point in the week, there would be an opportunity to respond to the Gospel and recommit myself to Jesus. In the years when I did multiple weeks in the summer, I had multiple opportunities to repent, and came back doubly sure of my salvation, at least for another year.

    The youth worker in me reflects on those days with a whole range of emotions. I’m appreciative of the passion and concern that those faithful servants had to the gospel and the attention they paid to the salvation that I needed to know about and own. Yet I’m also aware that emotions play a huge part in the moment as well, and wonder how we create the same space without the fear of lost salvation lingering with those who have already responded.

    How do we introduce Jesus without the hype, salvation without the guilt and shame, and response without repetition, wonder and worship without worry? The reality is that my faith was never the same outside of those “mountaintop” moments, when life rushed back in quicker than I was able to wash the week’s dirt off my dusty feet, in spite of my best intention in that moment.

    Not only is this song one that sounds like summer to me, but it reminds me of those moments. It reminds me of that feeling of coming back closer to Jesus and our relationship having that much-needed “kickstart” after being a bit lax and neglected in the interim. It speaks of rediscovery, recommitment, and a desired intentionality.

    I sometimes miss those days, and sometimes I forget to miss those days. I am not sure I am always that good at creating the opportunity for the love to kickstart again in my relationship with God, at recognising where I’ve got complacent. I’m saved. I don’t need another altar call. What I need is to spend time on the relationship I have.

    Find out what Example os up to at the moment – https://linktr.ee/exampleofficial