The Friday Fix

  • ‘A Thousand Times’ – Kinnship

    Michael writes:

    I don’t know about you, but I’m a thinker. I’m also a big self-reflector. I’m not sure whether that’s pious or egotistical of me (perhaps that’s another thing to naval gaze about at some stage!?) but I suspect, in actual fact, it’s really a little bit of both…

    The last few months have left me with a worryingly large amount of time to think about who I am and how I am. I’m not going to lie; I’ve not been OK for large swathes of it. I’ve also spent a lot of time thinking about the parts of myself I often try to deny or minimize or hide from others – that shadow-self that I am desperate for other people not to see, and yet I am all too aware of.

    Staring at ourselves in the mirror can be a vulnerable, painful and distressing activity. In the midst of this intense looking-glass season, I have found this beautiful song a really helpful meditation. It announces so much of what I have reflected about myself lately; that I am often two things at once – both light and shadow, both present and absent, both selfless and selfish, both OK and broken:

    I am rich and I am poor

    I am healthy and I’m sore

    I am certain and unsure

    I am one foot out the door

    I am dirty and I’m clean

    I’m awakened and I dream

    I am kind and also mean …

    I am strong and I am weak

    I am hopeful and I’m bleak

    I am fierce and I am meek …

    I am false and I am true

    I’m a wise man and a fool

    I will give you all you need

    But reserve the best for me

    The tone of these opening verses is undeniably bitter and disdainful. So often that is how I feel when I consider my own broken nature. Sometimes the self-loathing is palpable. Perhaps you can relate?

    But what I’ve found helpful and inspiring is that this song is not about despair, it’s about love. The kind of love that accepts both the light and the shadow of an individual, who they strive to be and who they are, the times where they are OK and the times they are not. It embraces the whole person, and in so doing allows that person to embrace their whole selves too:

    I thought I would find a noose, but instead you cut me loose

    Now that you have set me free, I reclaim my identity…

    As I’ve listened to this song many times recently I’ve found myself being slightly stitched back together and comforted. It’s OK that I am “Sometimes not what I think I seem” and “A dichotomy so to speak”. It’s OK that I am both pious and egotistical. Despite resenting and wishing to certain parts of myself for fear or rejection, I am already loved. And, I’m left wondering… maybe, if I can learn to more openly acknowledge, and even share these parts of myself, my sense of being loved will grow.

    Blessed are those who are honest about their whole selves, for they shall know love (Matt 5:8 – my rendering).

    Find out more about Kinnship by visiting their Facebook page – https://www.facebook.com/iamkinnship/

  • ‘Nothing Rhymed’ by Gilbert O’Sullivan

    Gill writes:

    It seems quite apt that I’ve been listening to this song lately because this time 50 years ago, ‘Nothing Rhymed’ was heading up the charts (it reached Number 8). It may be 50 years old, but I find this song a timeless one – and apparently I’m not alone in my love of this song as John Lennon and Paul Weller are both known to have loved it too.

    Gilbert O’Sullivan is the first singer and popular music-maker that I remember. I have distinct memories of the ‘Himself’ album cover lying on the record player in our home – and I know that I played ‘Matrimony’ incessantly as a tot.

    Gilbert took a backseat during my teens and twenties but re-entered my life in 2002 when this track took me by surprise whilst watching the film ‘Anita and Me’. I don’t know how familar you are with the story (the film is slightly different to the book – the Methodist youth leader in the book is the vicar in the film) but without wanting to give away too much, it’s the story of Anita (a white, working-class girl) and Meena (a British Asian girl) who become friends but are challenged by the clash of their cultures. It’s funny, poignant and definitely worth reading and watching.

    The song strikes up at a point in the film where Meena is desperately trying to make sense of the world – and it captures the mood perfectly.

    Nothing good, nothing bad, nothing ventured
    Nothing gained, nothing still-born or lost
    Nothing further than proof, nothing wilder than youth
    Nothing older than time, nothing sweeter than wine
    Nothing physically recklessly, hopelessly blind
    Nothing I couldn’t say
    Nothing why ‘cos today
    Nothing rhymed

    This week has felt like ‘Nothing Rhymed’ to me. The Overseas Aid Budget has been cut whilst the Defence Budget has received a windfall. Some public sector workers are going to receive pay rises whilst others won’t – despite all of them serving our communities amazingly during the last year. We’re coming out of lockdown next week but across the country there will be different Tiers that possibly don’t make sense in some places.

    It’s times like these when you can feel completely unsettled and unsure – about life, God and the universe. I think there’s a tendency for us to think ‘well if we can just get this one thing sorted, things could start going right’. The world isn’t a nice, neat place; lots of our plans don’t come to fruition; we can’t always control what is going on in and around us.

    We’re about to enter the period of Advent when Methodists will be remembering that #GodIsWithUs. This is something that is worth holding on to, especially in our unsettled and darker moments. It’s a time when the messages from Isaiah are revisited as part of Advent reflections. Perhaps we could go further into Psalm 40 than usual and ponder:

    “So — who is like me?
        Who holds a candle to me?” says The Holy.
    Look at the night skies:
        Who do you think made all this?
    Who marches this army of stars out each night,
        counts them off, calls each by name
    — so magnificent! so powerful! —
        and never overlooks a single one?” (Isaiah 40:25-31 – The Message)

    The troubled times of Isaiah perhaps ring truer than ever this year – a time when people are saying ‘God – where are you? What’s going on?!’

    Later in Isaiah, we’re reminded “I don’t think the way you think. The way you work isn’t the way I work. For as the sky soars high above earth, so the way I work surpasses the way you work, and the way I think is beyond the way you think” (Isaiah 55:8-9 – The Message). 

    It’s okay that we can’t make sense of the world. Time is sometimes needed to help us to understand and God can be revealed most of all in challenging and worrying times. We need to hold on to, and trust in, God being with us – especially at those moments when nothing rhymes.

  • ‘Let Your Love Flow’ – Bellamy Brothers

    David writes:

    “And which song would you like played for the recessional?” I asked the couple. We sat in the small chapel where, in a couple of months, they would say their wedding vows.

    “Well, we’ve thought about it. We’ll have sung a few hymns already in the service. We were wondering if we could have something a little different at the end. Do you know the Bellamy Brothers?”

    “1970’s, country/soul, long hair, sideburns, wide collars, bell-bottom jeans?”

    “The very ones. We’d really like the song ‘Let Your Love Flow’.

    While they waited for the title to register on my face, she began to sing as he strummed air guitar: “Let your love flow like a mountain stream, and let your love grow with the smallest of dreams, and let your love show and you’ll know what I mean, it’s the season…” She brought it up on her phone to play the rest.

    I smiled. Of course. Then, I crinkled my brow, reminding myself that I was being asked to assess its liturgical appropriateness: “…go stealin’ through the moonlit nights with your lover [?]…let your love fly like a bird on a wing…bind you to all living things [?]…So let that wonder take you into space and lay you under its loving embrace…” [?] Hmmm….

    “All right, I think we could do that.”

    “Great, we’ll download it and get it to the wedding stewards on a memory stick.”

    I don’t remember many details from their wedding day. I’m pretty sure I made some attempt to connect the flowing love with the biblical love from Colossians 3: “Bear with one another…forgive one another…clothe yourselves in love…let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts…” But what sticks with me most was the exuberant roar of electric guitar right after I pronounced the final Amen…. then…“There’s a reason for the sunshine sky and there’s a reason why I’m feelin’ so high, must be the season when that love light shines all around us…”

    I recall some faces (mostly the 40-50 somethings) lighting up and some heads bobbing. I can still picture the couple bopping down the aisle towards the door. Years later and that song still ushers me into church.

    We’re currently in a season when nothing much seems to be flowing. For most of us, mountain streams are virtual. Other than birds on a wing, much of our flying is grounded. Affection is restrained. Patience is in short supply. Joy is muted. Finances are tight. Political good will is at a trickle. Singing is masked. Praise is muffled. Relationships are distanced.

    And in the midst of all that, Jesus’ call to love remains loud. The invitation is to love God and love one another with everything we’ve got. Our neighbour is not to be merely tolerated or treated with wariness, but loved. These days I need more than an acoustic reminder to love. Crank it up to eleven.

    Find out more about the Bellamy Brothers at bellamybrothers.com

  • ‘Ooh Child’ – The Five Stairsteps

    Kristie writes:

    One of the best things I ever did was join a gospel choir. This was 10 years ago, my husband had just left and I made a decision to do something just for me. I got a babysitter, and each Wednesday night would head out to sing with others from around the county.

    We have a wide repertoire that includes well-known favourites such as “Lean on Me” by Bill Withers and “Shackles” by Mary Mary. There are originals written by our musical director. And then I’ve discovered songs I simply hadn’t heard of before becoming part of this community, like Israel Houghton’s “Not Forgotten” (recommended if you’ve not heard it either).
    One such new-to-me song was the uplifting “Ooh Child” by The Five Stairsteps. As well as singing it with others at gigs and rehearsals, it’s now my go-to song to sing by myself when I’m feeling low.

    It’s been a challenging year for many of us, and this is just the sort of song to help us hang-in there when it feels tough. Personally when I sing it, I imagine God singing it to me, reminding me that this too shall pass. We’ve never known what the future holds, but that feels truer than ever right now. I find it useful to remember that things change, and will ultimately get easier/brighter. And on gloomy rainy days I have hope that one day I will once more ‘walk in the rays of a beautiful sun’.

    We’ve not been able to gather to sing for 8 months now, but our Director has sent out songs and we’ve had Zoom rehearsals. We’re called One Voice Community Choir, which usually refers to how our harmonies blend. Right now it’s more literal, with my one voice accompanying the track. But it’s still singing. 

    I hope you too have songs you know will lift your spirits.  Here’s us having fun with it at a rehearsal: https://fb.watch/1yFQacy40V/

  • ‘Running to Stand Still’ by U2

    Jane writes:

    Sometimes in life you’re thrown a curveball that stops you in your tracks. They happen periodically and without warning and often in a way that’s oblivious to others around you. You’re coping but goodness knows how (maybe you’re not) and it’s just a case of keeping the show on the road.

    I imagine that such moments feel different for different people but for me they are often times when I feel overwhelmed and don’t really know what to do. I am busy ensuring stuff happens but essentially I am only just “running to stand still”.

    This global curve ball brings a whole new level of stopping in our tracks. It was for a while a temporary issue but now it seems like it may have to be a whole new way of trying to keep the show on the road and maybe, just maybe, we need to stop doing that thing that we do to keep on keeping on.

    To recognise it can never be the same. To notice that some stuff just needs to stop for ever. To be ready for it to be other than our usual experience. To simply try another way of being. It has to be okay too to have the freedom to say we’re not alright.

    In this song much of what’s written is connected to isolation and addiction. The girl within it …..

    She runs through the streets

    With eyes painted red

    Under a black belly of cloud in the rain

    In through a doorway she brings me

    White gold and pearls stolen from the sea

    She is raging

    She is raging

    And the storm blows up in her eyes

    She will suffer the needle chill

    She’s running to stand

    I know that we are not called by God to live life in this frantic way. To live like an addict in isolation or with an obsession for perpetuating the current pattern of our lives. To get our next “fix”.

    I felt from the start that this might be something we needed to face but as we come to Advent, we may just need to think about it a bit harder. Why do we do what we do at this time of year? Where do our values and faith sit within the busyness? How do we recognise who is important to us and make them, not stuff, the priority – even if the joy of giving and the hubbub of connectivity are all part of the fun of the season.

    I am not the sort of person who wants to cry “Bah Humbug!!” but I wonder if this year instead of rushing to repeat the pattern of years past we just take an extra breath and try something new. Break the “addictions” or “obsessions” whatever they may be and recognise that this truly is the season of God with us.

    God offers life. Life in all its fullness. Life that is challenging. Life that’s full of joy. That’s a complicated thing but its the offer we must grasp now. No more running to stand still. More of a walk towards God’s preferred future.

    U2 and everything about them can be found here https://www.u2.com/index/home

  • A plea for Friday Fixes…

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    To be honest, we’re really needing some Friday Fixes for the next few weeks so please don’t be shy and send them in!

    But in particular, we’d like to tie in our Advent posts with the Methodist Church’s Advent Campaign so songs that speak to you of God being with us would be cracking!

    Please, please, please – we absolutely love receiving Friday Fix contributions and are more than happy to help with editing and finding the video clips and links. All we need are your thoughts.

    So have a good think – and then put it into writing and send your thoughts to Gill at thomasg@methodistchurch.org.uk.

  • ‘Where Is The Love?’ – The Black-Eyed Peas

    Gill writes:

    I was listening to Bruce Springsteen being interviewed by Dermot O’Leary the other day and honestly, he could have been talking about the Friday Fix!

    He was explaining that songs to him, particularly as a teenager, became quiet or meditative prayers. Certain songs, he said, took him to a place that gave him a sense of life and spirituality. Well I couldn’t have put it better myself.

    There are songs of adoration such as ‘What a Wonderful World’ (Louis Armstrong); songs of confession like ‘Sorry Seems to be the Hardest Word’ (Elton John); songs giving thanks – ‘Thank You for the Music’ (Abba) being an obvious one and songs of supplication like ‘Call and Answer’ (Barenaked Ladies). Like Bruce, I often use songs as prayers. They’re usually more passionate and eloquent than I could ever be.

    I’ve been finding it hard lately – to be a human living in ‘unprecedented times’. I feel frustrated with restrictions and angry with decision-makers; I feel worried about where votes might go in the US this coming week and I feel unsettled with what January might bring when Brexit really begins to affect trading. In other words, I feel completely powerless. And that’s not an easy state to be in because the tendency is to start licking your wounds and dwelling on those unnerving feelings to the point of not living life.

    It goes against my natural inclination to spend time in the darker places. I tend to want to brush it aside and focus on what can be done to change things or lighten the mood.

    ‘Lament’ is a major theme in the Bible, especially in the books of Psalms and Lamentations. To lament, according to the dictionary, is passionate expression of grief or sorrow. The psalms of lament are profound poems or songs expressing human struggles and they make up about one third of the entire book of Psalms. They lay before God the trouble and woe of being human and make a request for His help.

    This song is most definitely a prayer for me at the moment. I feel grief about a number of things that seem insurmountable.

    Father, Father, Father help us
    Send some guidance from above
    ‘Cause people got me, got me questionin’
    Where is the love? 

    But then I look back over the last few Friday Fixes and I can start to see the love. Already God begins to answer my prayer as I see love in the tired foster carer; the rainbow chaser; the outcasts and girls; the grieving daughter; the concerned decision-maker and the dweller in the moment.

    Just like Bruce Springsteen says “there’s a certain quiet spirituality as these [songs] became quiet, meditative prayers”. Yes indeed, many songs are my prayers.

    The Black Eyed Peas have recently updated their song with Jennifer Hudson in support of the Biden/Harris campaign. When you visit their website, it will be the first thing that you come across. You may want to watch it. Or you may not – https://www.blackeyedpeas.com/

  • ‘Say Hello To The Sun’ by Baby Sensory

    Nigel writes:

    My wife, Sue, and I have recently started fostering children. Somewhat scarily for us, we are currently looking after a baby that is teething. We are in our 50s, and feel a huge sense of responsibility … and general inadequacy.

    Lots of songs came to mind that might be worthy of being offered for this blog as describing our current state of play and journey: ‘Things can only get Better’; ‘Help’; ‘It’s oh so quiet’ (not); ‘It’s the end of the world as we know it’; and ‘I just don’t know what to do with myself’ all come to mind. However, the song that is currently helping most is a baby song.

    As we prepared for the infant addition to our home, some friends offered us a near money-back guarantee on a baby song that they said would calm the most upset of children: ‘Say Hello to the Sun’

    The words are very simple and the tune a beautiful and gentle melody.

    Say hello to the sun, shining down on me, I love the sun, because the sun warms me

    Say hello to the moon, beaming down on me, I love the moon, because the moon guides me

    Say hello to the corn, growing strong for me, I love the corn, because the corn feeds me

    Say hello to the stars, shining down on me, I love the stars because the stars see me

    Say hello to the rain, falling down on me, I love the rain, because the rain cools me

    Say hello to the flowers, bright colours for me, I love the flowers, because they gladden me

    Say hello to my friends, playing games with me, I love my friends, because my friends love me

    Now here’s the thing … it does calm the baby down – perhaps not in a ‘money-back guarantee’ way, but it does have a positive effect. More importantly it calms me and my wife down; soothing our anxiety, encouraging us to be more selfless and more grateful for the things in our world.

    I don’t say this glibly or lightly as these are currently very tough times we are living in and the sleepless nights and isolation are catching up on us. We live in Nottinghamshire and are in Tier 2 of lockdown. We are very aware of the current challenges. Our Tier 2 status means we have lost quite a bit of our close support from friends and family who were helping us on the fostering journey by popping round, offering hospitality and sharing child-care responsibilities. At times it has felt like the only things and people we have been able to ‘say hello’ to were each other, the children, and the wonders of our natural world described in the song and created by our loving and generous God.

    We’ve got some solace knowing that something is shining on us, beaming down on us, being strong for us and sustaining us. We’ve taken comfort from small moments of peace in a time of chaos. We’ve witnessed innocent joy in the company of toys and books made of bright colours and had playful games amongst the richness of the autumn leaves and pools of rainwater in the street.

    If you are in need of a little calmness, respite and some soothing, then do take a listen to the song. It’s not a rock anthem, country classic, piece of vocal perfection or genius song writing, but it has helped us connect a little of who we are, the wonder of creation, our current context and a God who we still passionately believe wants us – and baby – to thrive and flourish.

    It’s also not a song that I can offer a money-back guarantee on. I can’t promise that if you listen to it all will be well and every problem will disappear, but it might offer a little perspective and bring a momentary joy that can help get you through the tough days we are too often experiencing at this time. Enjoy

  • ‘Chasing Rainbows’ by Shed Seven

    Gill writes:

    I guess that the address given at our wedding service might have taken some people by surprise. It started with the words “Everybody here is thinking of weddings, while I am thinking of funerals”. But then again, the person giving the address was my Dad and we’ve come to expect the unexpected from him over the years!

    The thing that had got him thinking about funerals was that we had chosen a rainbow theme for our invitations, order of service and so on. The rainbow in this context was that weddings are about endings and beginnings – that we were ending our lives as singletons (as Bridget Jones would say) and starting a new life together.

    I’ve always loved rainbows – my teenage bedroom wall had a huge one stretching across it – and just this morning as I sat down to jot these thoughts down, a full rainbow appeared in the sky over Grimsby. God-incidence?

    Rainbows have many meanings but it seems that most of the meanings tend to be reminders about love, hope and new life. Whether it be the rainbow flag of Pride, or the rainbow bridge of Norse Mythology linking earth with the gods, or the Celtic pot of gold waiting for you.

    This song by Shed Seven is full of the melancholy that yearning and hoping can be wrapped up in. We often think of being hopeful as being an optimistic and positive thing but being hopeful can be the hook, the connection, the thread that pulls us through the depths of despair. Hope can exist in our most darkest of places.

    I could deny
    But I’ll never realize
    I’m just chasing rainbows
    All the time

    ‘Chasing rainbows’ means trying to pursue the impossible or unattainable. There are moments, days and significant times in our lives where things may feel unattainable or unachievable. I know that there have been times in 2020 (where we’re living with Covid-19 in some kind of half-life) that have perhaps led some of us to feel that we’re chasing rainbows all the time.

    But rainbows have an element of surprise. We get excited when we see one. We look to see if it’s a full one or a double one. They can be fleeting or they can be there for a while. They raise our hopes and bring us light.

    And for those of us with a Christian faith, they remind us of God’s promise right back in the Book of Genesis – “When the bow is in the clouds, I will see it and remember the everlasting covenant between God and every living creature of all flesh that is on the earth.” (Gen 9:16)

    Perhaps ‘chasing rainbows’ is all about chasing hope. Some may think that that’s unrealistic, or a waste of time, or pointless. But for me, there is always the promise of love, of new life, of hope and I really don’t mind if you find me chasing rainbows – all the time!

    Shed Seven are still making music and you can find them at https://www.shedseven.com/