‘I Am A Rock’ – Paul Simon

Bev writes:

Paul Simon released  “I am a Rock” in 1965 (initially as a solo artist but within a year, it was re-released with Art Garfunkel), and it quickly became a hit in the UK charts. I never saw the attraction and can honestly say without reservation, that it’s my number one least favourite song of all time (The Birdy Song is a close second).  

I have no need of friendship.  Friendship causes pain.  

I touch no one, and no one touches me. 

I am a rock. I am an island.

And a rock feels no pain, and an island never cries.

The song portrays a person who has experienced emotional pain and has chosen to shut themselves off from others to protect themselves from further hurt. 

I imagine most of us can relate to the words of this song because I’m sure we have all, at some point, suffered the pain of a broken heart caused by the rejection of someone we love. It can be devastating, and nothing takes that kind of pain away.  No matter how well-meaning those close to us are, their words of comfort telling us that time is a great healer, and things will be alright in the end, seem hollow, insignificant, and sometimes downright irritating. 

We are all vulnerable when it comes to friendships, things can go wrong, and we can get hurt, however, to remain an island is to rob ourselves of something very special, because our relationships with other people can be truly transformational. 

I recently watched “The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel”.  I was rather hoping for something a bit more spiritually enlightening, it does after all take place in the heart of India, but alas there is only minimal mention of the Hindu faith. It was also full of clichéd characters – the widow looking to see if there was life outside of being a wife, a man looking to atone for his past because he betrayed his boyfriend, a married couple who had nothing left in common except their loyalty to each other, a woman who couldn’t accept that her youth had long since departed, and a woman who alienated everyone around her. The hotel owner, a very over-enthusiastic young man, answered all of the setbacks his elderly guests were suffering by continually reminding them that “Everything will be alright in the end, and if it’s not alright, it’s not the end”.

In some respects, I found it quite depressing because there was a strong thread of loneliness which ran through all the characters and I was tempted to switch it off, but I couldn’t.  I felt compelled to watch it to see if they all sorted themselves out, which of course they did, and they did it by getting to know one another better.  

This wasn’t without its difficulties though because some of them quite obviously rubbed each other up the wrong way. In the real world their paths would never have crossed because they had absolutely nothing whatsoever in common, yet by developing close relationships they each began to understand and empathise with one another’s respective pain, even to the point of devising plans to face them together.  By the end of the film, they had each been transformed by taking their eyes off their own troubles to help one another.

This so reminds me of how our church families work. We are called into friendship with God and that is the engine that drives every other friendship – because out of the rich resources of loving God and knowing God’s presence, we build our friendships with others, even those that we wouldn’t naturally gravitate toward, and to be honest, maybe even those we may positively avoid.

Friendships need to develop slowly and naturally, but if we are living within the confines of past hurts and disappointments there is every chance that our lives will bear testimony to the words of Paul Simon’s song.  That would be tragic because we were never meant to be an island – we are God’s means of enriching others and ourselves through true and lasting friendships. 

So my prayer for you all is – don’t be afraid to take a risk on friendships. Yes, you might get hurt – nobody can guarantee that you won’t but I do know this – everything will be alright in the end, and if it’s not alright, then it’s not the end.

Find out more about Paul Simon at http://www.paulsimon.com/